4/30/2006

i got an escalade rollin on pdubs

. P Dubs

Shortened form of Pussy (or Penile) Warts. "P" for Pussy (or Penile) and "Dub" for the "W".

Get out of here Skeletor, nobody wants your P Dubs.

4/28/2006

I can't find a camera

I seen a two story cactus. That officially means I'm at the gates of hell.

4/25/2006

NEW IMAGES THAT BLOW YOUR MIND FROM SUPERMAN RETURNS!

I've got candid promo pics of the new superman movie they are great this movie
is going to be more awesome than Zathura. Oh my god he is like the perfect choice
to play Superman. Look at that bulge. It's changing my mind turning me into some
sort of elite astral being that is so enlightened and hatest anyone who
doesn't know about sacred geometry or cool things about numbers and alchemy and light extension and alex grey drawings they suck and are so not cool! Worship me!!!


HOLY SHIT 125 POSTS

I dont believe it. ginkfist outlasted my last herpes outbreak,
id do a post, but jesse sounds like he's dying.
i'm kinda scared.

Whoa Black Betty!

4/24/2006

It was I who shanked you.

I won't lie and say I had a great day, but it was great.

Some say men are only men when they have a man in them.

God doesn't come to think he comes to gink.

If you battle a horde of angry dwarves extend your arms and yell out, "Behold I am the father of giant wishbones!" If this doesn't work start kicking and screaming.

Eat twice a day but once more than Sally if Eric had anything to do with what Jon told Jenny before Marge took a bite to eat except two more than what Eric had anything to do with than what Jon told Jenny twice before Marge really ate the fucking thing.

If you smoke cigs you are more likely to smoke cock. If you smoke cock you are more likely to find me tapping on your shoulder in...three...two...one...yes that's me tapping on the back of your head.

Give me a dollar for a fourty so I can take a shit on your floor and have you clean it up.

I wont invite you in unless those socks come with disposable lint machina erected from the spruce which came from all that reflected our concise representation of the holy spirit divide.

That channel changer pisses me off more than Hermione. She's on her period now. Y'know what that means? I'm not going to jail for your sick thoughts fucktard!

Eat my meat and break a stone. Belief in Allah gets one thrown!

Don't chase a bottle rocket. It has a kidney stones.

If 40 is the new thirty is 90 the new 18? Yeah baby raw like grandma pound that plum!

If someone says they are short-handed they probably mean they cant fit there fatty little fingers in the pickle jar or they left a pickle in their butt and can't reach to get it out.

Dogs can only see in ultraviolet and black light. If they sniff your nuts that means they see a cum stain on your pants. You should really get a new pair dude thats gross. I know it isn't yours. It's from your girlfriend? I'm sure the dog didn't sniff that one out.

I fought a man in prison. He was locked in a cell while poked at him with those clubs the Canadians beat seals with. He cried because I started calling him Salty Larry the Angry Butt Phlegm. I found out later that his dad used to call him that.

The news paper sucks today. It talks about Terrorism. That means every newspaper from here on out is going to suck. I envoke you all to write to the editors and let them just print the sports page. The Yankees one? On second thought don't even read the newspaper.

Whisky dick only happens to Wilford Johnson the III. It's just too bad he was the first human.

If zero is a number how come there isn't a bill for it?

Gilbert was here.

Yanni was at this clubhouse and lost a game of checkers to that goat in that one story about that goat.

Homer wasn't really a bard but a drunk fucker who made all the prissy bards tell this story about a guy who came home and found his wife fucking all these dudes. Of course the King James version is the Odyssey you are reading nowadays.

If there is one thing I want you to do...it's to smell your hands after you cut your toenails. Goddamn is that the most aromatic shit you ever smelt in your life? I could eat a toenail if it had Johnny's on it. What happens when you eat nails? Is it like when a dog chews on a hoof? Or when Kevin Federline looks up into the sky and says, " If it weren't for the mushroom and the primate this very second I stand erect to look towards the great heaven would be an obsolete observation. I stand alone in the light of hours darkest reverie to peer inward the succulent sophistry in the eye of a weakened automaton. Pine from the circuits aggression and let zephyr catch the Popozao. "

Pee on a fence then climb it.

If you lay in the middle of the street nothing will happen until something happens.

4/22/2006

Whoa...that was cooler than impregnating a galaxy don't you think?

This image occurs inside a spectral image of a wave by Aphex Twin

4/20/2006

You are so fucked up you don't even know it

I'm a celeb but nobody likes me. That's why I post scant pics of every movement. Life never meant so much as the last JPG fapper Ryan sent me and I posted it the first. I take shots of water to get faded off the text I bequeefed to the world. My homies think I'm tight but I'm loose like panty hose over a Yokozuna. I take the time to make captions around an anonymous picture and pretend like my blog is the greatist thing that happened to a celeb that didn't know it was cumming when she let her mams hang out like a National Geographic cover starlet. I forked a pig and nobody cared. I was dancing in my underwear before Tom Cruise had a name. Aliens intrigue me but not to the point where an apple is the name of the next holocaust. Fortifiy the justification that the jealousy is taking over the rant equal to the observation of starvation. One could think of trikes rolling down the hill into the popes mouth while he spews yellow orange shit from his eye sockets into a group orgy hording the only corn left to feed a million ebola victims already dying of VD from Cancun and a Hep shot that went wrong on American Midol. We all have mold hopping on a scooter man dyking into the trains forskin prune ruin eggs vast condom reach out for the stars hopes that don't man any goblets working against the revolutionary strides that make us believe we are the only individual pleasure we can only really make haste of happiness from dweeds as it tortures the very soul of duke wipes from a trashy oxford render magazine. I hope I make more sense then George Washington flying above on a hover board ready to prize us with candies molded into a razor blade that makes Mountain Dew seem like a Vault with all the secrets of Edgar Cayce's Lone Ranger DVDRs. I hate Drunken Stepfathers Superficials Thighswideshut and a links i cant link to. I want celebs to be so known that we can smell it when they fart from a 5600 mile radius. I want to know when they itch their calfs on Europa. I need to be inside the mind of someone everyone cares about but not really because qwerty was so important they had to make a stand and tell everyone hey this person is so fucked up except when you realised that they were you became the slug under the salt umbrella protected from harm but for the fact that my life is so underrated people should follow me around when I make phone calls to the bank telling them that their automated systems purged my identity into a Iron Maiden video and that the British sold me 14 tons of heroin because I was the most fapable thing since the Who. This is dyke syndrome. A stain on the face of humanities underwear. I don't care if we save phytoplankton just take me to the next Canadian fuck booth so I can cum on the outlandish orc bitch who is doing this for money because she says she has nothing else to do. I believe it. Or I would be asking everyone for the Lindsey Lohan nip slip. I care because Jews dont. I fuck tree limbs and stumps because the earth is more important than a nice warm puss. Blank willow...blank willow.

4/19/2006

For the birthfist

Happy birthday 2inthegink this is what we'll drink!

I have compiled images of what we will drink on the night of 2inthegink's 45th bender day in a row falling on beyond the cusp of his birthday. FOR THE BIRTH HAITIANS!

Every album that ever sucked is implanted in a chip inside Elisha Cuthberts wrists...they jingle when she takes a tinkle.

Recently I uncovered the script of Judas. That shit was tight. He talked about Lil'Jon the Baptist being the Don of Judaic operations and Missy Mariot being the badass hoe I always thought she was. Judas was gunned down in the Blood Field Territory while the Roman Clique had a field day with homey Hey-Zues on the Cross. 2-pac fled the scene with Suge Knight and Fitty got shot again. Of course he survived the past mellenia. That's why his albums will be eternal and nothing will stand in the Geh Geh Geh Geh Geh Geh G-Sus' way.
In other unrelated material I sent in a couple of dudes into what should be a confined haz-mat area of an apartment. They scolded me and poured hot butter between my buttcheeks and had African wild boars tickle my craw hairs until I gave up the secret location for CTU to infiltrate. I went down with honor because before the interrogation I played a mean hand of Texas Hold'em. I got fourteen aces to win the mortgage on Daniel Radcliffe's house. Plus his kiddy porn collection unmatched by that of Johnny Carsons.

4/18/2006

Ginkstrip

4/15/2006

Light a match!!!

DONT FORGET TO FLOSS.


ITS IN YOUR MOUTH BITCH. NOW BRUSH N00B
-scary thing is, his eyes werent edited at all, wtf.

4/14/2006

Tim Austin and Elfinvale Kelpies

Wanna eat some Kelpies?
Sounds like good eatin's to me!
Wanna do some blow?
Sounds like some good nasal to me!
Wanna fuck a rabbit in the doo doo hole?
Sounds like some bunny to me!
Tim Austin is Shakuhspeaar to a Kelpie for what
I am to an unborn ogre fetus.
He's my hero.
Move over D. Quaid, D. Cheadle, D. Rum and D. Chain, T.A. and the Elfinvale Kelpies are moving in on a bitch ass trife scooter pusher from the highlands of Scotland. What your butt nuggets they gettin' picked by black eggs and stink fingers. Group O'gs and shniat. Blow back from the toilet catch a lil poopy particle on the butt cheaak!

the bangcock pornhut

HAPPY GOOD FRIDAY,

i had a dream with babies spinning around singin reo speedwagon hits. so i took this post down. Im a giant pussy.

I steal from the internet, and old ladies.

Stolen right from wikipedia


I steal for free bitches.

-This comes straight from EMO HELL

Though the original emo scenes were not exclusionary, the modern "emo" scene has developed into a "gay friendly" scene. Though it's unclear whether it's related to the diminished "macho" elements of emo music or the "gay friendly" nature of the scene, it has become commonplace for detractors to use "emo" in combination with popular discriminating gay slurs, such as "emo fag".
There is also a common stereotype that associates "emo" with self-harm, most notably wrist slashing, mainly due to the song lyrics of popular bands conforming to the image of emo in the public eye, which often speak of suicide.

Shutup "emo fags." quit wearing my moms pants, and my grandmothers hair and glasses. you make me poop a lil.


this is whats on CNN
when i wrote this, croikey im a bloake!



nevermind. i forgot what where that was all going. IM HAITIAN.

4/10/2006

What up bro

Celebratin 101 posts

Celeb News of the Gink

Insider news has reported that Staind frontman Aaron Lewis has kicked some major ass with the new Stained Album. He has souly done all the music for Staind's album with his mouth. The drums, guitar, bass, and assisted programming was all hummed, rat tat tatted, chuga chug chug, and deedle da deeted with the virtuoso tongue of Lewis. The new album was leaked through a septic system yesterday which coincidentally is entitled: Poop Staind Cycle When asked of this as a marketing ploy to sell the album to potty mouth humorists like the South Park demographic, Lewis was qouted saying, "My daddy beat me. This is an expirement into the psychosis of the shit in my life. And the shit that will always be in my life. I know I have a lot of money and my tear sockets have dried up, but I'm still crying inside. It hurts y'know to be rich and better than Limp Bizkit but still suck. My daddy beat me."I have the cover art of the new album and the tracklisting posted below.


  1. My daddy beat me
  2. Poop Staind Cycle
  3. Nothing is left but right
  4. Poor rich hate anger song
  5. The dad of hate
  6. Hate the of Dad
  7. Your dad is right behind you
  8. Watch out your going to get beaten
  9. Listen to this song after abuse
  10. Hang my fathers father
  11. Were is mommy?
  12. Gorge into the feces
  13. Poor rich hate anger song (Remix) Ft. Lil Jon and Wierd Al
  14. (Daddy yelling in the background secret song)

4/09/2006

Folkfest is finally over.


I dont know how i survived. Probably thanks to all the blow. Can i get 7 potato, shit yes five minutes. I think theres a hair in one of my orders. Strange, i thought i took it out.

Fuck blogger.

I made a kickass post, and its not lettin me upload. I'm about to fly off the chain and let all those little kids outta my closet.

I voted for nader.

4/06/2006

I like that basket can I have it?



White people suck. I farted. So now Miller High Life has taken the throne of PBR and no one drinks Bushmills they want Jameson. Well I've got some Jameson. Some Louise Jameson. I've wanted to not get fucked by her for some time now but hey you can't win all the good ones over with just a rape victims moment away from calling in the Dr. Stranglove in for some cookies and barbecue ribs right? I think that love is some sort of poopy diaper that you just can't get over the smell of its lingering stagnant pungent poopy butt. And I love it when girls have knives. It makes me ho-orny.
I've known that the Britons are wedgy nucleus.

Here is a picture of an Anchor-dude.


I've totally seen this guy when I was at a strip club in Mazomanie, Wisconsin. He put a roll of penis between a strippers ass cheeks and she unrolled them with her butt muscles so the pennies would fall out of her ass like it was a slut machine. It was a neat trick. I then bought him a couple rounds of cocaine and we met Neil Young in the Viper Room and had a Jonathan Brandis moment. I've done that before but it wasn't as cool because I was still thinking about what that stripper had done with her ass. After that was a shitshow we went to Little Chute where the poop done get loot. We at chitlins and puked up caviar we had at Ronald Whiskey's bar and grill. It was cool. Then I went to Baraboo. And saw this picture below me.


You know that you can't really run from a glowing zombie ass if you wanted to. Be patient. You don't need to get into all the mumbo jumbo doovoodo. Just sit back and goldfap to a sickling zombie woman who wants to sit on your face and make a glow worm pie. I thought Jerry was cool. I pea. You lovelorn fucktwad ace in the hole perry driver. You are reading words.

<----I think I see a doople.

4/05/2006

If you want to be cool like me

If you ever want to get pussy or dick which ever prefered you must narrow you horizons to these tasks:

  1. Eat a vast amount of gangrene shrimps
  2. Take a diabetic shit in public
  3. Let no pube be unturned
  4. Piss in a butthole
  5. Reach for that diet lo carb vanilla cherry caffeine free soda and do a 98 hail Beavis
  6. Claim Hitler made O.J. forfiet a 2 dollar bill that had sacred writings to destroy the NAACP
  7. Have a Klan meeting at the nearest church
  8. Let everyone know you are planning a vacation to Borneo but really go to Iraq and sell bootleg copies of Justin Timberlakes sex tape in which he preforms a spiritual ritual regurgitating his own semen into the mouth of a 56 year old midget named Thomas Applebottom Smiley.
  9. Greet the Pope with a what up dog hand shake and proceed to tell him Wu-Tang clan ain't nuthin' to Gink wit.
  10. Announce that you are running for the President and when this happens you must resign on the grounds that you have better things to do before you take a shit on America.
  11. Vow your are not a virgin until you break your thighs crushing Lexington Steele in a mud wrestling match.
  12. Skip along the rainbow of an enlightened LCD LSD PCP DVD trip.
  13. Render a homeless man through 3-d Studio Max and let Knoppix do the talking while holding a 14 year old bottle of Bushmills in your afro.
  14. Make a wish through the Make-a-Wish foundation but tell them that you don't have any legs because you got them shot off in the Korean war. But really you have to get the shot off while meandering through the halls of the Whitehouse in a clown suit on a segway bumping OMC records and masturbating to a picture of Torrie Wilson on a crack cocaine bender.
  15. And finally try and kill yourself but survive a 15 story drop into a pit of sand demons that have tridents paying homage to Aries and all his glory. This will get you into heaven and you will have 9.0002345843 seconds to bust a nut onto a radicalist Taliban midwife pouring a vat of spermatazoa in an indian ink bottle ready to write calligraphic nature scripts for the celestial rules to using Edgar Cayce's akishic porn collection in a violent rampage against Peter Jackson and all that his testicles stand for.

Hunt for Red October

And now your daily dose of hamburger porn! Some naked some clothed.

Albert Gink's Fucked up comic's from beyond the grave.

After will hung won the ginkoff (which scored his asian ass a free myspace profile and a carton of menthol cigarettes) his first decree was that Albert gink should start bringing us crazy comic's. Eat your fuckin heart out hung, here it is.

SPIDERMAN GETS GINKFISTED

4/04/2006