this computer does not contain any photoshop

I had these really great idea to put Micheal Vick's face on the cover of High Times since he got busted for having a bong on the airplane. Hey I get his reasoning. If he ain't going to the Super Bowl let alone the playoffs why not try and get high on an airplane so you can act like Samuel Jackson and keep yelling in peoples faces about snakes because your so high you can tell the difference between a stewardess and an anaconda. Alabama black snake honey. I tried Popeye's chicken today. And I immediately thought of the Maynard's astral chicken post I did a while back. Speaking of Maynard I might go see Tool again. But I don't know if I should save up for Coachella or Led Zeppelin. They are reuniting this summer. I guess they are going to have the corpse of John Bohnam on stage sitting next to a drum machine while Robert Plant sings about his babies in every verse of every song. Actually it might be the baby tour Zoso style. Tickets are probably more expensive than the Super Bowl itself. I'd rather spend my money on a donkey show for my birthday. I was thinking about going back Juneau for it so I can relive those redolent smells of seaweed. Seaweed is good for lubrication I heard and you can also smoke it and get really sick because it doesn't do anything. I also heard that it doubles as piano wire.
That reminds me. I once saw a diagram of a cat piano where you use a hammer that has a spike on it so every time you press a key it spikes a cats tail. I guess the guy even arranged the cats voices into octaves so it could actually be played. Here is a picture of it I found. I always found it morbidly humorous. I would like to arpeggiate it or circuit bend it like Richard D. James. I'd hook a car battery up to their brains so every time they thought about eating albacore they would have seizures and the grandest random harmony would reverberate through the Sistine Chapel.

There is something I have noticed recently. I ride the bus a lot as transportation or the cab. The cab is a whole nodduh story brother I'll have to get back to my Taxi Cab confessions later. But there is always someone with down syndrome on the bus. I have nothing wrong with people who have ailments except Chinese child prodigies. They make my hair stand up and small termites latch on to them and burrow into my skin and make small colonies where other little colonies already staked claim and then the white ones push the brown ones onto a small piece of land and make a casino so the brown ones can feel like they have a warm welcome into the economic cycle that is white termite manifest destiny. I think downies are Metro Police in disguise. Because they always harass you like its their business to know where you are going. And you know behind their eyes that they are capable of acting a little normal. I've had a couple of bad downie experiences in my time where they thought they should get special treatment and in some cases they should and in some cases they shouldn't.





I found the Turkish Wizard of Oz




I also found this badass powder lookin' muthah rockin' out to the keytar. When we said grampa can't jam we meant it cause this guy shreds the keytar. Plus I think he frequents bath houses.

Drini who is Jimbo Wales? To me this is what Jimbo Wales should look like.


Gramps might not be able to jam but he sure can down a fifth of rye whiskey and make advances to aunt Etheline while she just got down working on an oil rig off the coasts of Micronesia. She gets lonely sometimes. So does he.

For some reason the other day I mistook these two girls I was hanging out with for lesbians. I felt bad because by the end of the night I found out they both had boyfriends. Has that ever happened to you? I don't know but I'm kind of thinking that everyone chick that I meet is a dyke on a trike. It might be because no one shaves their armpits in Bellingham.
I was LIKE just LIKE thinking of this LIKE the other LIKE y'know LIKE the other day. It was LIKE a total LIKE epiphany in LIKE some weird LIKE cosmic sort of LIKE way.
And finally I don't even know what this means. I cant comprehend it. It's almost as if I was one of the Natives of North America that couldn't see the the massive sails of Christopher Columbus right in front of me because it was a foreign object that the state of mind couldn't perceive the person to ever see.
I guess I'll see you guys when I see you. I hope El Ginko is keeping the fam adhering to Ginkfist. I know his posts aren't as badass as mine but you'll have to leech onto his Vienna Sausage for life support. Remember when he was going to move? And tell Miles to quit blatting before bed, it's not healthy for a cat his age.

R.I.P Homey

This is Georges dad. We called him the Whitesnake. He passed away a little while ago but I figure we should still pay tribute to one of the coolest fathers around. RIP Whitesnake.

i took a break cause i was constipated.

wait.

I didn't know anyone read ginkfist. i thought it was like a journal. like private. the reason i havent wrote in my journal the last few days is because i've been studying the mega tit yeti. I'm thinking its related to the Gross boob face, and yokozuna somehow. but one can never be certain. I thought gink had died. turns out he didn't, and that paint chips are edible, they just soopasize yo shit, yo. that yeti that the megatit is holding looks kinda like a cross between alf and a real life mr hanky. and by mr hanky, i mean a shit you took after xmas ham. jew's,muslims, and dwarfs need not apply. I finally have access to PhotoShop CS. so now maybe i'll get up outta this mspaint sweatshop, and up into the big leagues.You are gay. at least the good lot of you are. some of you are probably sluts too. thats okay as well. i bet that austrailia would be a slut around us and some champagne. and by champagne i mean high life. champagnes cool, it doesnt get chicks drunk enough though, or at least drunk enough to do me. i end up with Monarch Vodka chicks. and thats only after theyve puked on the bar and removed their shirt to wipe it clean. at least it aint gay. I bet if we invited Ginkhole back, he could take one for the team and do a dude and end up on drinipedia for it. Perez hiltons on drinipedia. thats bullshit. we're popular too damnit. cept our crowd isn't the get drunk and end up in the tabloids crowd. our crowd is the get too drunk to go home so theyre on your couch sleeping while i grab their boob crowd. I might live on a boat this summer, and just cut anchor one night with a shit ton of cup o noodles. the inventor of it lived to be 96-ish, you can never tell with old chinese people. theyre all named methusula. i need to get a brian peppers jolly roger though.

who farted? i bet mile's did. fuck.


oh, and thanks for the comments you wahoo's. good to know we're not the only ones still gettin good coke round these parts.

tenaciously the armpit of destiny

armpits are the most ugly part of anyones body. Even a butthole doesn't look as bad as an armpit. Brittany Spears' left nipple on steroids eating McDonald's French fries out of a milkshake looks better than the dynamite armpit. Twats are ugly but armpits make them look like little cuddly teddy bears that you can give your friends small children when they are sleeping soundly and not having to think about armpits. You show me your armpit I swear I'll stab it and fuck the orifice. Don't even try it buddy.

Holla at a Balla

The song is called Fuck my Dick. Kind of catchy don't you think?

The wishing well is dry so I spit in it and out grew an Ivory Tower in my absence

At the moment I do not have the internet. I have been forced to Rambo my way into peoples houses to make sure that I can check up on Myspace and stalk my ex girlfriend. I drink a lot now and work too much and I jammed at a bar with some Moorish dude last night. Actually I think he was Amish. Besides that I have recommended many students to go into Harvard law because I get a percentage of their benefits and they give me free medical for this rad outbreak of herpagonasyphilaids. But not really. I miss Ginkfist. It's my baby. Y'know its been about a year now since we conceived this retarded FAS baby out of our cancerous womb and fed it amniotic fluids for 32 weeks and then let it swim in Mountain Dew regurgitation and duck feces? I know its grand like a mint left on your pillow after you had sex with the housekeeper. She likes to bend over and let me watch her snort coke of a popular mechanics magazine. It always makes me chuckle. Sometimes I can picture it as a Norman Rockwell painting. It's what has become of our classic Americana these days. That and playing spin the bottle with a nuclear hand grenade and who ever it lands on the person has to make out with the grenade pin in their mouth.

I can't leave you guys for a long time again without showing you a couple of shitheads I pulled from Google's ass.

Sadly I have to say that Vampire chicks always make we want to be a chick myself. Not a tranny but a woman. I know its sad to say but if I was a woman I could get more women. Now think about that? And I could run around in white pants when I have a period and we all know what kind of Jackson Pollock that would make. It would be an art nouveau movement that would lead to a highly fashionable statement. Then I could honestly say that I would come out with those mink fur condoms I've always wanted to market.

Path of destruction leads to a deer in the windro.

Seriously. Supersize my shit please. Ill post the audio later.

Drini Du Fu

GF=PORN

i put us on randomwebsite.com awhile ago, and now they think ginkfist is porn and banned me. its only porn if you're making the oh face on a pole in the viking.