I smoke two fools before I smoke two fools and then i smoke two more

I'm (or I was) midway between one of the oust burgeoning cities in the world and a ghetto infested with crack whores and people who are of the Spanish origin. I have nothing wrong with Azteca or crackheads but I do have a problem with binary and stale whiskey.

I don't know if I've ever mentioned this before but I would sell my soul to Robert Johnson just to learn how to solve a Rubik's cube without algorithms. I would then back out of the contract and owe my next 1 trillion souls to Satan's love child with Danny Devito. Things wouldn't be awesome for a trillion years times 24. Yes...24 trillion years.

I told my friend that my standards are like limbo. You have to get low. Lil' Jon got low once. Then he put acid mixed with sparks and henny in a plastic gasoline tub and made music for the masses. At least that was two or three years ago.

Time flys by like a kite ready to hit small children in the face. Hitting small children in the face is a crime now but I remember a time when it was an Olympic sport. Or maybe that was a drinking game we played when we laughed at kids who played "special" Olympics who had faces that looked like they got hit with twenty kites at once. Either way parents will still buy their children Fred McGriff training videos in hopes that they will all become Derek Jeter cybernetic monsters and bring baseball up from the ashes of steroid abuse. This does not mean that I don't think Derek Jeter does steroids but it does mean that I think he smokes a lot of cock on the off season and takes a lot of cock in season.

My definition of pudwacker.
If I could find a picture of his son it would be my definition of abortion.

And I created this gif because potty humor is potty humor and potty is humorous.